Kissing is a huge part of romance.
Have you ever seen anyone kissing on the road in Nigeria, or engaging in public displays of affection (PDA)? Probably not. This is because the Nigerian society is judgemental in general, and it is believed that Nigerians and Africans have a high moral standard, unlike oyinbo people.
But we all know that the moral standard is just a facade and everyone is pretending. It’s rare and almost impossible to see a young Nigerian couple kissing passionately in public. Here are some reasons why:
1. People don’t mind their business
If you kiss in public, everyone is probably going to stop what they’re doing just to stare at you. They’d even add commentary and lament about how the current generation is rotten.
You do PDA in Nigeria and passers-by will be looking at you like pic.twitter.com/JFpZjRDw6W
— Makayaki (@Layken_Odabo) June 1, 2016
2. You can get knocked by a stranger
This is not a joke. Nigerians take the ‘It takes a whole community to raise a child’ saying very seriously, and a total stranger will come and offer you home training since you lack it.
"in nigeria if you show pda someone will come and knock you" – @OJOkoli
— bai🌿 (@baimonns_) April 7, 2016
3. You can get arrested
You know the members of the Nigerian Police never do the job they’re actually paid to do. They’ll arrest you on the charge of ‘Public indecency’, and make your family pay a huge amount to bail you out. Imagine a Yoruba mother going to bail her daughter from the police station because she was caught kissing in public? It won’t be a pretty sight at all.
4. Your pictures will end up on Nairaland and Linda Ikeji’s blog
Like I said earlier, Nigerians don’t mind their business. Somebody will take photos and post it online, and it will end up on every single gossip blog.
5. You will get a dirty stare and insults from a Yoruba aunty/mummy
Their stares can kill. Enough said.
6. Someone you know might see you
Imagine your mummy’s friend seeing you kiss on the street. Or even your pastor. Just know you’re dead.
7. Your bae might be shy
If your bae has excess home training, they’re probably not going to indulge in PDA with you on the streets.